It seems rather funny,
And rather strange...

That a person such as me,
Would peek from behind a wall...

My bodyguard of stones,
Shielding my true feelings.

I took another peek,
And saw the one beautiful thing standing there,
Talking and laughing,
Oblivious to all around you,
Lost in your world.

I sighed...
World...
Two of our worlds were different...

And yet for some reason,
You were all I see,
You were all I feel,
You were all I hear...

But you were a mere dream,
And would always be a dream,
Unless I woke up,
And make that first step.

Okay!
Here goes!

I took another peek,
And saw you closer,
And for some reason I was pulled back again,
Hiding behind the wall.

What's wrong with you?!
Why can't you do this?!
I keep telling myself.

Be a man!

But that's the thing isn't it?

For a man is weak when his heart gives in,
When a beautiful sight befalls upon him,
When suddenly nothing else matters,
But that one angel that stands before him.

He is weak and powerless,
And for once,
He feels as though,
He's nothing but a small speck,
In a universe so large.

I wanted you,
To find me within that universe,
So you could make me complete...

My strength I could not muster,
My will I could not find,
My courage I could not bring...

I took another peek,
You were still there.

How is it that one can be so beautiful?
How is it that one can be so angelic?
How is it that one can tug at my heart ever so?

There was something about you,
I can't quite explain,
Was it your hair?
Was it your eyes?
Was it you cute smile?
Your cute...lips...

I felt hot in my cheeks...

What's wrong with me?
Why am I feeling this way?
Why am I so scared and afraid?
Of a person who doesn't even know I exist...
Who doesn't even know...
How much I'm thinking of her...

And then it hit me...

And I felt the other side of this feeling...
The emptiness...
The pain...

Of not being known...
Of not being noticed...
By the person...
Who I wanted to notice me so much...

Come on!
She's waiting!
She's there!

It's so strange really...
I wanted to tell her...
Tell the whole world how I felt...

And yet,
I didn't want anyone else to know...

Why oh why?
Why am I feeling this way?
Why am I so nervous?
So scared?
So afraid?

She's so gentle,
So sweet,
I'm a guy...
So why can't I do this?
Why can't I just get up and talk to her?

I feel scared,
I feel weak,
And yet...
I know that if I took that step,
I know that my world would change,
That everything would be perfect,
Would be complete...

Okay! This time I must go!
This time I will!

I stood up and turned towards her...

And saw nothing but emptiness,
As she was gone,
No longer there...

For several moments I stood there,
Not knowing what to do...

And then like the cold in the night,
It crept upon me,
Crept upon my heart,
The sadness,
The emptiness,
The disappointment.

Why didn't you make that step?!
Why didn't you do it?!
Why didn't you step up and make the move!

I felt defeated,
I felt weak,
I felt like there was nothing to live for...

I felt...

I was lost for words...

I slowly went down on my knees,
And sat there...
Sat there for some time...

And after some time,
Time eternal it felt,
I guess it was time to go...

I lost the battle for today,
I lost the fight,
I guess...

Lost for thoughts...
My mind was empty...

I stood up weakly,
And with no will,
And walked down the corridor.

As I turned around the corner,
I got a shock as I saw someone there.

Stop!
Brakes!

I let out a sigh of relief,
For I didn't bump into that person,
But the sigh was short-lived,
As I saw those beautiful eyes staring back at me.

It was you...
You...

I was suddenly shaking,
My heart pounding,
And head spinning with thoughts,
Trying to say something.

My mouth could only open,
But my voice betrayed me...

You stood there staring at me,
Staring at this person shaking,
Probably wondering what was wrong with me.

Oh no!
What should I do?
What should I say?

And finally I mustered...

“H-hi...”

A stammered hi,
And I would know that minutes later from now,
I would be scolding myself for being so silly,
In front of her...
Of all people...

“Hi...”
You replied.
And my head rushed,
As your beautiful voice snaked into my mind,
As your beautiful voice played with my head,
Sending sensations throughout my body.

I stood there still,
Paralyzed,
Muscles aching to move,
And finally they did...

“Hi...”
I said again and then walked away,
Quickly,
My face burning with blush.

I've never walked so quick,
Walked as if my life depended on it...
But it did...
You controlled my life,
You pulled the strings of my heart...

Quickly I walked,
Never stopping,
But one thing I did,
Stole a glance I did,
Turned my head around to look at you...

You were smiling,
And then you giggled,
As you saw me walk down the corridor hastily...

That smile...
Was it for me?
Was it towards me?
What did it mean?

But then...

For some strange reason...

I felt complete,
And scared,
Two opposite ends of the feeling spectrum...

What did it mean?
What did that smile and giggle mean?

You looked up at me again,
Smiling still,
And I knew...

That image...

Of an angelic beauty,
With a beautiful smile,
And beautiful eyes,
And a beautiful voice...

Will be with me in my dreams,
Will be there playing with my thoughts,
Will be there as my heart skips and jumps,
Both in fear...

And in happiness...
A happiness I could not explain,
A happiness I could not understand...